Really?

Josie runs up to me waving her cape. "You'll be my sidekick!" she demands. I don't think the kid understands how this superhero relationship goes.

Return

After four months or so, the Blue Mermaid is back in the house. It's like she never left heavy rotation on the DVD player.

That's what it means?

Did you know Caillou is French for morphine drip?

Name that Tune

Quite weird as the kid sat in the back of the car as she guessed the movies based on the Disney song playing on the radio. She also can sing part of Captain Hook's "Cover of the Rolling Stone." Why isn't there a kiddie Name That Tune?

Dream life

The kid had a hideous nightmare about crocodiles. Still not sure what the creatures were doing in her head. But I realize I can't let her see previews to Gator Boys cause that's just tempting more 1 a.m. screams.

No Bane for the Baby

I've decided not to take the kid to see Dark Knight Returns cause she's going to shout out the ending before the movie's over.

We're going where?

Josie just informed the wife that tomorrow I'm taking her to Disney so she can meet the princesses. She's going to have to settle for a Superstore to meet the bulk papertowel display. Sometime times dreams are absorbent.

Bribes or fear of the Fox?

• I'm thinking of telling the kid that foxes attack little kids that have poopy pants. She know it lurks in the yard - maybe it can sneak in through the AC vents? Is it wrong to use wildlife to scare kids straight?

Reverse prizes

Trying to get the kid to "finish" potty training has been a pain. The promise of what she'll get if she joins the no diaper club hasn't quite worked. So I went to an extreme as I packed up the portable DVD player and hid it. I told her that it ran away until she can prove she can use the potty. It worked today as she told me she had to go. Only a few more successes and the DVD player will return from its secret place.

That's not how it's done

This morning Josie declared she wanted to have a surprise party for herself. I think the secret is out.

Getting over the hump

There's a strange fun in watching the Batman series with the kid when she knows the characters already. It does get weird when she can do the same thing with The Wire. Tonight she told me that Omar lives by a code.

I feel like a gameshow host as I keep explaining to the kid what she'll get if she doesn't have to wear diapers anymore.

What's our winner get, Johnny Olsen?

How about a kite, a goldfish and a brand new Dream Pet!

She's still fighting going for the big game.

You don't get to watch that!!!!!

Need to reorganize the DVD vault as Josie insisted that the box for Boogie Nights contained a "Princess story!"

Time Travel

Explained to Josie that she needs to take a bath because future Josie will be upset that I let her go to bed with macaroni and cheese in her hair.

Forget Dr. Spock, I'm going for the Dr. Who.

Title

When I write a book about all this, the title shall by "My Life as a Human Jungle Gym."