Eternity

I had to explain to the kid that she has to wipe herself with toilet paper every time she goes to the bathroom. She gave me this look like I had just doomed her to a punishment of the Titans.

When is My Real Day?

Today's Mothers Day. This means I get to hear everyone babbling on about all those things mom did for them. As a stay at home dad, I do a lot of those dirty chores. I've changed more than a dozen diapers. I've had to kiss a lot of booboos. I've had to make dinner many a night. I feel kinda weird knowing that I grew up to be a mom.

Sure I didn't have my bodily organs stretched all out of proportion for the miracle of birth. But I've changed diapers. Father's Day just doesn't cut it for me. There needs to be a Stay At Home Dad Day. Although that is any day that a relative takes the kid for an overnight visit.

What have I done?

The child is now addicted to the zebra milkshake at Chargrill. This is all my fault. I'll have to send us both to rehab. Shall we get to share a room with Lindsay Lohan?