It's a trip

The event ceases to become a vacation the minute you take kids to the resort town. It's just a trip with a different set of things that make you scream, "Don't touch that!"

pay dirt

Is it wrong that when I watch Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, my basic feeling is my kid could dominate in the world of toddler beauty contests? Or is that sense of domination the scam they run to get people willing to pay $5,000 for a glitz gown that a street hooker would call a desperate cry for attention?

Hmmmm

Not to get too gross, but it appears we've finally turned the corner on potty training. It's been three weeks since I've had to clean her up. Three years in the making. Now I know how Stanley Kubrick felt when he was able to sit down and watch his first complete rough cut. There's more refinement in the process, but for now I've had three solid weeks of not having to reason with the kid that she needs to use the bathroom and not her pants. Someday my sense of smell will return. Probably about the same time we have a second kid.

Bedtime music

Josie feel asleep in the car to Brian Eno's "Another Green World." Something soothing about "Third Uncle."

You Took Them to See What?

Often I joke about taking Josie to see Cinema Overdrive screenings at the Colony Theater. Who doesn't want to treat their daughter to "Silent Night Deadly Night?"

So after taking Josie to see The Lorax twice, I went alone to see Iron Sky. It's a fantasy action film about Nazis hiding out on the dark side of the Moon that invade the Earth when Sarah Palin is running for re-election. It's a great movie. It delivers on the promise of Nazis on the Moon. Big action of flying saucers attacking New York City. Much better use of Nazis than Inglorious Basterds. What got me when I entered was a young geeky couple had brought their little ones. Two kids under six or so. Which is cool.

What was weird is that after an hour of Nazi violence - people getting shot and injected with needles, the couple grabbed their kids and rushed them out of the theater during a clothed foreplay scene. After the romance was over, they brought the kids back to their seats around the time they got to watch a guy get shot in the face.

How can you bring kids to an R-rated film and somehow a scene of passion is too much for their little eyes, but a bullet between the eyes is fully acceptable. You're all in or you're all out. If you're going to be the cool parent, you can't give them the idea that passion is more dangerous than violence. It's a bad message to scar them with bullets while shielding them from kisses. You've lost your cool parents status - mysterious couple with kids.

Church going

I took Josie to the Six Forks Station to see her first indoor movie. She'd been dragged to the drive-in, but there's no worry with that since she gets loud, you roll up the windows. The cinema has a kiddie screening at 10 a.m. We arrived to find out it was The Lorax. I was hoping for Dark Knight Rises. I bought her popcorn and she was digging into it before we got to the seats. She liked the up and down fun of the theater seat. But when the film started, she stayed put. She laughed and said a few things, but wasn't out of control. She even told me when she needed a potty break instead of wetting the seat. She understood the sacred nature of a movie theater.

The only bad part was when we left the theater. She was crying because she wanted her own big TV. Sniff. Sniff. That's my girl.