what to do for Xmas?

While holding the baby down for her 1 year shots, we sang "Happy Birthday" to her. The doctor's assistant pointed out that there's now a chance she'll associate birthdays with pain. that means we won't have to worry about her getting too excited when she realizes her birthday is coming up. No cries of "gimme." Instead she'll just cower with fear. Now if only we can psychologically ruin Christmas, it will be a peaceful house in the winter time.

happy birthday

it's the baby's first birthday. we're celebrating by having milk and watching Mighty Boosh. soon she gets shots!

How to celebrate

We celebrated the anniversary of our last day with the baby on the inside by going out to a restaurant. Before we could order drinks, the baby had yanked the tablecloth. The flower vase toppled over and soaked Becky's side of the table. While wiping up, we realized this was Josie celebrating the anniversary of breaking her mom's water. And they say kids can't remember that sort of stuff.

Happy Anniversary!

It was a full year ago that I spent my last carefree day not worrying about any baby weirdness. That day I still thought the baby's due date was June 12. Two weeks of peace, quiet and no bottles that turned out to be a LIE!!!! We even went to the OB-GYN for a check up the next day and nobody said, "She's going to make the move this afternoon so don't plan on making dinner."

No Good Night?

For months now, part of the baby's good night routine involves me reading Good Night Moon. It hits me after the 235th reading - why doesn't the little bunny say goodnight to the telephone? He says good night to everything mentioned in the first half of the story except the phone. Is there something wrong with the phone? Is it not permitted to leave the little bunny? I want answers since this problem has been keeping me up at night.

why is it empty?

So I stick the baby in her playpen and her first impulse is to throw every stuffed animal and toy out of it. She's like Ric Flair during a Battle Royale. Of course once the toys are gone, she looks over the top and whines that there's nothing to do while stuck in the playpen.

A Baby-cation

Finally I have a morning free of the baby. And where do I spend it? In the dentist chair getting my teeth cleaned with the sonic screwdriver. Is it wrong to feel a little sense of release with blood leaking from my gums? It didn't hurt that the baby decided to wake up at 5 a.m. The sweet joy of tartar scrapping is less painful on my ears.